First of all thanks very much to Mike Ashley. I've actually got some proper up to the minute pertinent local material to start my first show with on Sunday. Thank you ballatty. Now I don't have to look at every fuckin story The Shields Gazette or The Berwick Advertiser has thrown up this week trying to find faldy daldy human interest stories, 'hilarious' in their trivialness and thus try to look like some latter day Cyril Fletcher.

The comedy story as far as myself is concerned, is undoubtedly the 3,000 (and counting) extra hits I've had this week for my 'Gateshead Council Third Reich' routine on Youtube. At first I couldn't understand why the thing has all of a sudden skyrocketed. After inspection though, it turns out that with council in the title, it's been a very innocent but effective link from a big Youtube hit about some cunt falling off his ladder that worked (past tense the bloke has now been sacked) for Morrisons the builders and they were doing a job for Gateshead council. I think that's the meat of the story, if I've got it slightly wrong well I'm sure no one will mind, as I always say, research wastes time so I'll just have to go with my initial understanding of this. It's a funny clip like, I'm sure if you put Morrisons and Gateshead and falling off ladder into Youtube you'll find it. You know how it works, I mean I try to hide this blog as much as possible but you all seem to find it and thanks for the extra hits recently, things are gannin through the roof at the minute, admittedly the roof of a porch canopy, not a high rise flat but through the roof all the same.

I've a dinner tonight, who knows what to expect. It's down in Piercebridge, first time I've been there since me and the lads stopped for a piss once in 1987 when a TWOC motor incident went on during a very out of control part of my life. That's all I'm saying. It should be half decent, you never know with these dinners like and on Friday it's a gig at Ayelsbury at The Waterside Theatre. On Saturday I'm in the other direction at Aberdeen. I know it seems like Chas fuckin Chandler is doing my diary but it was me as it happens putting as many dates in as I possibly can to keep the wolf from the door. He's been on the drive for about 6 years and me talking to him about my garden and family matters with a bit of football thrown in to stop him coming up the drive. Bloody wolves (and that's not the football team who's fans chant at us 'Where were you when you were shit', aye average crowds of 4,000 in the 80s lads, I'd keep your black country mouths shut if I were you).

Right I'm off for another rehearsal. Don't expect me to be brilliant as a result of these rehearsals by the way, I'm just rehearsing my speech when I accept the award for runner up in Youtube hit of the year about stuff in Gateshead. Speak tomorrow.

TODAY'S BLOG IS SPONSORED BY THE BLOKE FROM NORTHERN IRELAND THAT'S PART OF FIFA SAYING THAT POLITICS AND FOOTBALL SHOULDN'T MIX. THIS WAS IN A LIVE INTERVIEW DIRECTLY AFTER A.........GLENTORAN AGAINST LINFIELD MATCH!

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Comments (1)

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written by BLUEMAN FROM LONDONDERRY , November 10, 2011

I think the name you're looking for is JIM BOYCE who is neither a Glen man or a Blueman but in fact a Cliftonville supporter - YES THATS RIGHT. The same team who weren't allowed to host LINFIELD during the height of the troubles as they saw it as an opportunity to promote POLITICS in the form of shooting and bombing visiting supporters. FUNNY OLD WORLD isn't it??!!
JIM BOYCE- f**kING TWO FACED HYPOCRITE!!