THE LATEST NEWS PAGE

WEDNESDAY 10th MARCH

It's my dog's birthday today. Happy birthday Bobby! 8 years old and still as vicious and belligerent as ever.

I've been to Sheffield tonight doing the South Yorkhire leg of the Charley Boorman tour. What a great crowd!! York on Monday was much more stuffy. Amazing how different people can be in different parts of the country for what is a very niche show. It's on to Brighton tomorrow and then Nottingham on Friday and Blackburn on Saturday.

The May dates are selling already. I'm very pleased with the way the sales have started. No doubt Saturday will sell out as was the case last year with Friday and Thursday close behind. Other announcements will follow this year I promise you. Speak tomorrow hopefully.

TUESDAY 2nd MARCH

As you can see I've mistaken the date below as some sort of leap year. No wonder it's not had a lot of hits this week.

I write this as I just get off stage in St. Albans on the Charley Boorman tour. It's been a long haul already and tonight's crowd were very middle class. I forgot you do get this in middle England, very, very straight crowds that don't let themselves go. Tomorrow is Cambridge and then Thursday is Bournemouth, then Wolverhampton and Birmingham. It's a bit of a busy week to say the least.

Big announcements to come that could be very exciting. I will let everyone know. Speak tomorrow, can I do 4 in a row!? 

MONDAY 29th FEBRUARY

Two days in a row, will people see the like again! Anyway it's day 2 of the 2 days off and I was just getting into being not gigging. Got to drive down to St. Albans tomorrow where phase 2 of the 5 phase tour continues. Billy (the host and compere of the Charley and Simon Q and A) was upset that on an online bike forum, he got needlessly slagged off, apparently they called him a scouse cunt. Join the club Billy, it's amazing what people will bravely say from the safety of anonyminity ie behind their lap top. I say a lot of stuff on this site but fuck it, I paid for it and my name's all over it and it's with substance unlike what some people do.

Anyway it got me on line today and I put my name in to check what people were saying about me and it didn't disappoint. The usual bile from a couple of different people both with their facts completely wrong about me whilst diatribing about my act. Cheers lads. I do play the Grinning Idiot even though apparently this was a new comedy club that people like me and Dave Johns apparently aren't allowed to play because of the 'stag and hen based nonsense' that we do at The Hyena Cafe. Then there was some other twat on a different forum who remarked that I was so unfunny that I'd actually banned my own videos from youtube. It's not me who's banned them you moron, it's Viacom. Thanks for thinking I own Viacom mate but unfortunately I'm a mortgage paying comic who reluctanty plays to stags and hens.

Anyway upwards and onwards but it's faceless cyber warriors that are the enemy of myself, Steve Bennett I can just about tolerate because at least he puts his full name to the Gavin Webster hatred. Speak tomorrow maybe.

SUNDAY 28th FEBRUARY

Hello readers, sorry it's been a few days but it's been solid gigging for the last six days. Milton Keynes was ok, Buxton not bad, Glasgow better, Middlesbrough surprisingly good, Newcastle good as always and then Warrington reserved but ok. It's been very steady and all of the cast and crew are nice blokes. It all starts again on Tuesday in St Albans then Cambridge wednesday then thursday Bournemouth, friday Wolverhampton and then the week ends in Birmingham. Perhaps a tougher week than last week and we're only a fifth of the way through but it's better than vegitating in the house.

There may be big announcements coming soon on various things, some confirmed some not, but I'll let everyone know on the front page. Speak tomorrow 

TUESDAY 23rd FEBRUARY

I write this in Trowell services on my way from Milton Keynes to Buxton. Last night was a total sell out in the Stables theatre in Milton Keynes and although they weren't a comedy audience, they did laugh in all the right places (more or less) and considering I was told to keep the swearing to a minimum, I reckon I did not a bad job. This is going to be a long five weeks but it's the first big (some would say proper and who would I be to argue) tour I've ever done a support on and it's going to be a strange experience, especially when a lot of the crowd aren't expecting comedy.

There are other developments happening elsewhere but I must keep them all under wraps for the time being. Needless to say, I don't think I've got time to fart in the next 12 months. I'll still keep this column going, I have to keep suppying the demand of hits. Speak tomorrow

SUNDAY 21st FEBRUARY

Drove back through the night from the smoke. Didn't get back till 5 in the morning. Was woken up by my missus at about half eleven with the news that Jason Wood had died. Terrible news, lovely man. Makes you think however bad it gets with money, relationships, work etc. at least we're all still here. He was only 38. RIP. Will do a tribute on Talks to The People.

The gigs were quite good at Balham. Great to work with Jack Whitehall and Mickey Flanagan as well as Kerry Godliman and Danny Buckler on the Friday. When you work with great comics and not pavlovian, generic wankers, it renews your faith in this once great circuit. Keep flying the flag all you great comics, Britain needs you. Warrington tonight then it's the start of the tour. Speak tomorrow.

THURSDAY 18th FEBRUARY

In the middle of a glorious 2 day holiday then it's back to work again at the weekend in London.

Next week is the start of the Charlie Boorman tour and that should be a flat out roadfest however it should be good fun travelling round Britain doing a tour support something I've never done before.

No Edinburgh this year but I am working on scripts and book ideas so it won't be a wasted 2010. Speak tomorrow. 

WEDNESDAY 17th FEBRUARY

Last night in Glesca was a good night. The students were receptive and polite and to be honest, that's the best you'll ever get out of students these days. Daniel was the main support but the open spot Mikey was very funny and had lots of good stuff. I had to burn the midnight oil in order to get home that night. I'm off for two days and didn't want to spend day one driving home.

The weekend should be good, I'm at Balham Banana which is a legendary London gig south of the river that I've been doing for over 15 years now. Friday one show and Saturday early and late, it's one of the great alternative gigs that's still going so if you're in the Balham area then get down to the Bedford pub at the bottom of Bedford Hill just along the road from Tooting Broadway station or is it Tooting Bec. I always get that one mixed up with the one where Woolfie Smith shouted Power to the people. I'm off to the match now. Speak tomorrow 

TUESDAY 16th FEBRUARY

Twas a good night last night at The Hyena at the Haiti benefit. It was one of the best Hyena audiences of all time being that it was full of geordies and not a stag and hen in sight. Well done to Della for putting it all together and it was good to see the all star cast doing 10 minutes each, held together by an increasingly more pissed Dave Hadingham as the night wore on.

I'm away to Glasgow yet again tonight for a gig at The University. Another midnight oil burner as I drive home afterwards. Should be a good one but if it isn't it's only a few hours out of my life.

Haven't got my one man show up on the Live Theatre website yet. As soon as it's up I'll let people know. Speak tomorrow 

SUNDAY 14th FEBRUARY

I write this in a ponsy cafe in Glasgow's ponsy west end. I'm performing a children's show (that's right sweary, abuse on toilet walls, making the c word sing Webster is doing a kid's show this afternoon at Glasgow Stand) and I'm desperate to fill a 15 minute set. I'm peversely looking forward to it, after all the kids can't exactly kick my head in if they're offended and the sort of parents that would take their kids to a show like this I don't reckon are fighters.

The shows this week went very well. Friday was a bit weird but I got through it. Last night was good but some people were off their tits on the drink. The dynamic of comedy fans is definitely changing nowadays and only the strong acts will survive I reckon. I may be wrong and who knows maybe I'm not one of the strong ones and maybe they might all go for the whimsy comics and the provincial loud shouters like myself might get left behind, you never know what's coming next.

Anyway perhaps I've left the big announcement to last. As soon as it becomes clear it will be delivered on the home page, having said that if the big deal doesn't happen, then there will be no announcement. Cryptic and teasing are definitely the buzz words today. Speak tomorrow hopefully.

THURSDAY 11th FEBRUARY

Thanks to all who came to the 2nd annual Geordie Ridley night at The Klub in Wallsend. A great night was had and an enthusiastic crowd of young'uns, old'uns and some people who looked like they'd never been to comedy before. Great response, thanks to Dave Greener for doing a great job as compere and to John Scott who did a great support. The quiz went well and 1 verse of the Blaydon Races was good fun as well. 

It's all full steam ahead now for the weekend at The Live on the 27th to 29th of May. I hope some of last night's crowd turn up. Speak tomorrow. 

SATURDAY 6th FEBRUARY

Sorry it's been a while, once again busyness kicks in! It's all in the whole package of being a stand up comic who has to pay a mortgage and thinking of new hatstand schemes in order to attain legendary status in the future. I keep telling people about Howay The Laughs at the end of May, I'm trying to make this the biggest one yet in terms of sales. It's going to be tough going but hopefully it will sell.

The Charlie Boorman tour starts soon which is all very exciting but it is going to eat into my time too. I was thinking of selling T shirts at my show in May. It's great to have the joke 'I've got fuck all available in the foyer' but it's starting to wear a bit thin now. It will involve more work though. Isle of Man was great fun as was the night for Wallsend Boys Club at the Labour club in Wallsend. At the time of writing I'm stuck in Birmingham doing Birmingham Highlight. Two shows tonight which will involve playing to legions of stags and hens, good money but not good for the soul. Speak tomorrow hopefully. 

TUESDAY 19th JANUARY

It's Tuesday 12th of January, NUFC are getting caught by the pack, I'm a bit skint and I'm in Birmingham tonight doing a small gig to keep my head above water before the cheques clear, January is a tough time for a comic.

Doing the NUST do in Wallsend on Thursday which should be a good night. It's for the NUST and for Wallsend boys club. The only thing is though, the gadgies at the boys club who I play five a side with every week might not enjoy it, they were going on about how good Brendan Healy was so it's a long shot they'll like my stuff.

A trip to the Isle Of Man, a tour with Charlie Boorman and then Howay The Laughs in May should make for a good first half of the year, mind you I won't tempt fate, something's bound to fuck up. Speak tomorrow

SUNDAY 17th JANUARY

What a great weekend at The Stand, definitely the best club in the country. If every gig was like that, it would make for a great comedy circuit. People laughing at good stuff and not accepting bland, ordinary comedy by numbers by bland ordinary acts which blights the television at the moment, it's a proper mesmerising, draining experience which is what watching live comedy should be. Let's hope they do make that move into Newcastle and open up in the centre of town, the people of Tyneside and the people of the Stand deserve it.

Had to break it to the top brass that I'll not be at Edinburgh this year at the fringe, it's annoying but there you are. I have to earn some serious money this year so as I can afford to go in 2011, you heard it here first.

The thing I'm looking forward to this year is my Howay The Laughs show down at The Live Theatre on the 27th to 29th of May. Lots of other little surprises on the way but that's the show for people to go to. Speak tomorrow.

FRIDAY 15th JANUARY

Last night at The Stand in Edinburgh was a great night. Myself and Matty Reed with a mad Australian woman and Scott Agnew. Once again the Stand audience didn't disappoint with the usual mix of loud guffawers, raucous comedy lovers, yet some people who looked genuinely bemused by the whole experience. In this case, they were two Finnish women at the front and they obviously saw a Glaswegian, a mackem and a Geordie a bit too far removed from standard English for them to grasp.

Same bill tonight but Susan Calman is doing the compering. Been to get a ticket for the Hearts at the weekend and am about to watch the Ian Dury film in town. Speak tomorrow

WEDNESDAY 13th JANUARY

Last night was a great night in front of the impressionable students at Edinburgh University. It's weird being at The Pleasance when there's no one there, unlike the fringe when it's full of folk. The students were good fun too, they were great sports, even the kid who was mortified when he told me he was doing Ethiopian studies. Drove home and skidded several times in the borderlands but I do live to tell the tale. It was great to see Ro Campbell for the first time since Edinburgh and it's good to see him doing so well. 

There's been a great deal done this week which will happen at the end of May. Looking forward to it already. Speak tomorrow 

TUESDAY 12th JANUARY

Had a great night last week in the Irish club for the NUST christmas do. It's the first vaguely political campaign I've ver been involved in and I'm only the resident clown but it feels great. I know we're going to win, do I sound like a wanker now?

Last weekend was the changeover from Jongleurs to Highlight and there wasn't a great deal of change but at least they got rid of that terrible Robbie Williams song to start the show with. And it was fabulous to just have a white backdrop behind us as we performed. Pierre Hollins was on top form, he's a proper comic with great routines. Also Geoff Norcott did a great job closing the show. Let's hope those those little things could signal the start of Highlight putting great shows on. No one wants to see gigs go to the wall.

Got Edinburgh University tonight and then Edinburgh (The Stand) from Thursday, always a great city to be around, I'm very much looking forward to it. Speak tomorrow

WEDNESDAY 6th JANUARY

It's twelvth night and I can't get to a Christmas party tonight because of the ridiculous weather. I have my first gig of the decade tomorrow and I hope it's on. The weather is taking it's toll and I need work, for my financial peace of mind and my peace of mind in general.

The big news about to go on the front page is the fact that there'll be a topical night starting up regularly at a Newcastle venue very soon, that's if this weather calms itself down a bit. Speak tomorrow

MONDAY 4th JANUARY

Haven't made my debut this decade yet and Wednesday's gig has been cancelled so I'll have to wait for the NUST do in The Irish Club on Thursday. God knows what they're going to make of me seeing as they've seen me already this year. Not done my latest big routine to that lot yet so maybe Thursday will be the day for that number.

Geordie Ridley night is a goer and there might be something else big and regular starting this year in Newcastle so watch this space. Speak tomorrow 

SUNDAY 3rd JANUARY

Can't decide whether to do Edinburgh this year or not. Will have to make up my mind fairly soon but I don't want to go up with a half cocked show or a show with absolutely no budget whatsoever. The Jongleurs closures have made people be more careful with their expenditure now.

The big local thing coming up is on the 7th where I'm doing an NUST gig at the Irish club in the toon. I think tickets are £6 and can be got in The Strawberry as well as The irish Club itself presumably. After that it's the Geordie Ridley night at The Klub in Wallsend. The rest of the year, well it's a case of wait and see. It could be a snorter or it could be a damp squib depending upon what decisions are made in the next few weeks. Speak tomorrow

FRIDAY 1st JANUARY

Well happy new year one and all. Last night's new year show for the Grinning Idiot lads was proper good fun. The Gateshead gig at Ravensdene Lodge was probably the better of the two but the Benton one was still ok. It was spoiled by two women that wouldn't stop talking (I think some class B drugs might have been involved).

I'm going to be busy this year both locally and nationally so I'll try and tell you about everything that's going off starting with a night on February 10th in Wallsend. I'm going to be popping up in some weird places this year I can tell you. Details to follow. Speak tomorrow. 

THURSDAY 17th DECEMBER

It's now three days in a row loyal readers, I might still do this daily yet!

Last night was a good gig in Manchester Comedy Store. I compered which made a nice change. Some woman came up afterwards and said the immortal but patronising and getting it wrong words. 'You were actually better than the acts, you should do comedy yourself'. I know it wasn't meant but if I had a pound for every time someone's said that, I'd not be wondering whether I could afford a holiday but be wondering whether it would be the Seychelles or Bermuda.

Compering again tonight and then it's a reversion to sets on Friday and Saturday. Good company this weekend with Steve Hughes, Dave Fulton and a couple of others.

Counting the days till christmas and then there'll be big announcements in the new year. Speak tomorrow

WEDNESDAY 16th DECEMBER

Last night was the final night of Falderal ever. It was the final night of the Falderal tour and of my first ever tour. So the tour had started in earnest in Peebles and ended in front of 55 in Louth but it's been great fun and I'm sure in two years I could do something somwhat bigger and more grand.

Thanks to all the people who worked with me at several of the venues, especially Jon Reed, Tamiko Mackie and all the staff at The Stand as always. Some of the great Falderal set pieces will remain and there will be three new shows next year (I'm not fuckin kidding). So cheers to everyone that came to all the shows even the stuck up twat in Berwick that had a go at me on Chortle blaming me for the mikes not working. Watch this space.

TUESDAY 15th DECEMBER

It's been a busy week hence the paucity of news entries. Last night in Scunthorpe was fantastic, a great gig in front of aabout 70 which isn't too bad for a Monday night not long before christmas. The night before in Grimsby wasn't too bad either. It's been a steady tour and not bad at all for a first effort. I reckon I'll tour again in 2011.

Looking ok for New Year as well, sales are going well and there will be more than one NUST gig in January to look forward to.

Haven't decided about Edinburgh 2010 yet but when I make my mind up, the loyal will be informed first. Speak tomorrow HOPEFULLY 

TUESDAY 8th DECEMBER

A night off last night and it was partytime as me and the missus went to 'As You Like It' in Jesmond to The Viz 30th anniversary party. It was great fun. I didn't get too drunk as there was three Mordue pumps on (Radgie Gadgie, Workie Ticket and the other one that doesn't have an industrial Geordie name) so drinking those all night meant that there was no dangerous whisky on the horizon.

Was talking to many folk, Billy Ward, Rob Brown and his other half Barbera, Mark Jensen, Ray Laidlaw, Alex Collier and Simon Donald of course. Many other bods were there including the gadgie who put the Shearer shirt on the angel, Keith Allen (not looking that much like a hellraiser), that Charlie woman from Emmerdale that used to be in The Poetry Virgins and Supermac himself (who I now keep a wide berth of probably because of my drunken antics the last time I bumped into him after the TCT do at The Sage).

Arthur Two Stroke, Chris and Simon's cousin and Eddie and The Hotrods povided the music and we left before it all started winding down and getting ugly.

I hope there's more nights like this before too long. Speak tomorrow

MONDAY 7th DECEMBER

It appears that the abuse I receive on line doesn't affect my live work. I keep getting bookings by the ton load whether it be local, national, corporate, small room, student, mediterannian cruise, comedy club, tour supports, theatre one offs, football campaigns or anything alse that involves me standing up and attempting to make a room laugh. I say attempting because sometimes you wonder whether you are funny. Playing to a room full of christmas twats in Leicester last week was definitely a strain on one's patience.

New year promises to be good and next year looks quite exiting. Just glad the work is flying in despite my popularity amongst the cyber warriors and critics being the comedy equivilant of Status Quo in the 80s. Speak tomorrow  

SATURDAY 5th DECEMBER

Inevtably, Leicester has turned to shite. I'm on first every night and the last two nights have been a struggle to say the least.

Last night, pretty much everyone to my left on stage just stared as though I was delivering a lecture and laughing like a drain at the compere saying 'look at that shirt it's shit' or 'eeeh sorry for looking at your cleavage pet' and generally doing old fashioned heckle put downs and insults to a party hat crowd. He's done me no favours all week but he won't see it like that, never mind at least I can actually sell tickets in my home city.

Tonight is the last night in Lecester and surely I've got to stop this christmas party lark. I do have to pay my mortgage though.

New year is looking good. Haven't had the latest word yet but a couple of weeks ago we were selling tickets very well. New year is a much better night than christmas and hopefully this year will be the same. Watch out for more announcements soon. Speak tomorrow. 

THURSDAY 3rd DECEMBER

All going quite swimmingly in Leicester at the moment. I think the real arseholes will emerge tonight. Apparently we're sold out and when Jongleurs is sold out and the room is full of balloons and party hats, you know you're in for trouble.

Berwick by the way was a great night at the weekend. The response from the crowd was terrific but there was a wanky comment from someone on Chortle.com and as you know that website is very much my nemesis and the compiler of that site is someone who's done his best to hold me back over the years.

To the person who put the comments in, it's not me who sound checks the mikes you fuckwit!! I am not the technician, take it up with the theatre! And also if you felt like you had to laugh for the wrong reasons, well let yourself go, you would have been drowned out by the sound of the genuine laughter anyway. Anyway thanks for your money and by all means, bad mouth me to all your friends so you can act as a wanker sieve for the next time I play Berwick. Speak tomorrow

WEDNESDAY 2nd DECEMBER

Must keep this brief for a variety of reasons but the next big night is New Year I reckon. I'm at The Ravensdene Lodge in Lobley Hill Gateshead and after that spot I'll be hot footing it across the river to close at the Blue Flames Sporting Club.

In the new year I'll be involved in a few NUST and supporters club one off gigs as well as some Northumbrian Comedy Society events. Details will follow on the front page as soon as I get a bastard minute. Cheers

THURSDAY 26th NOVEMBER

I'll have to be brief because I'm going to Lancaster University in a minute but last night at Whitley Bay was a belter. Dan Willis and John Smith done a great job. John was fantastic particularly and Dave Haddingham really tickled the crowd as a headliner.

Maybe we'll do it again. We've had a couple of great nights up there. It's a nice little secret gig to do on a Wednesday night. 

I'll give out the details about the Charlie Boorman tour on the front page very soon. Speak tomorrow. 

WEDNESDAY 25th NOVEMBER

New Year should be a good one what with me doing two in the one night (one in Gateshead and one in North Tyneside). We're all going poster crazy at the moment and the north east should be awash with posters in a couple of weeks.

Also I'm 95% sure I'll be doing Blyth Spartans FC's club house on the 30th with a couple of other comics. Details will follow.

Next year promises to be an exiting one. Watch some bastard spoil it. Speak tomorrow 

TUESDAY 24th NOVEMBER

Got a bit pissed last night after watching the toon on the telly make heavy weather of shitey Preston North End. Night off tonight and then the start of an interesting gig week which includes the romantic settings of Berwick, Shewsbury and Lancaster amongst others. It's a far cry from Doha, Barhain and Abu Dhabi but at least I can drive to and from these places.

It's great news about my tour supports next year with Charlie Boorman, he seems like a really nice bloke so hopefully it won't be a pain in the arse being on tour with him, the other biker feller and Billy Ward the tour manager.

Next year looks to be busy already what with the Charlie tour and all the NUST type stuff as well as the circuit gigs. 2010 may just be an interesting one. Speak tomorrow

MONDAY 23rd NOVEMBER

Got a busy week this week culminating in what hopefully will be a good night in Berwick on Saturday at the Maltings Theatre. Tickets are steady rather than brilliant but hey, if you're selling out Berwick then you're doing bloody well.

My new year's gigs will be going up on the front page next week. There are two of them on either side of the Tyne but I will release details in good time.

Also watch out for a professional quote of support of the NUST campaign. I've sent a quote out to them this week and this should hit the papers very soon. Speak tomorrow 

SATURDAY 21st NOVEMBER

THURSDAY 19th NOVEMBER

Turns out Aberdeen was very ordinary. A long way to go, I can count on one hand the amount of times I've played the place, it just wasn't inspiring. Gus the organiser is a great bloke and so are the other lads who run it but as far as the gig is concerned, it's a dimly lit room with bad sound and it was hard to be heard properly. It's amazing how that makes a difference to a gig.

Anyway I'm in London tomorrow and Saturday playing for Ha Bloody Ha in Chiswick and Ealing and West London in general. Haven't done the gigs for years so hopefully a good time will be had. I'm doing five in total. Details are on line somewhere and in Time Out and on Chortle's bitter and twisted pages.

A gig to look forward to in Berwick at the theatre next week but unfortunately after that the christmas crap kicks in and that's not a lot of fun. Speak tomorrow 

MONDAY 16th NOVEMBER

After playing in the desert in the last fortnight to largely racist ex pats in Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Doha and especially Barhain, I now return to the domestic scene by playing our very own oil rich city Aberdeen. It may not have the weather of the aforementioned places but hopefully tomorrow night it may provide a more warm welcome than I received from some of the people in the middle east. Don't get me wrong the gigs were quite good and the organisers were really nice as always but some of the Brits out there were a proper bunch of wankers. It's great to be home in the cold amongst real people again.

I've a couple of irons in the fire both locally and nationally but I will let you all know what I plan to do next very soon. Speak tomorrow 

SATURDAY 14th NOVEMBER

Sorry it's been a couple of weeks almost but I've been to the gulf working and they don't allow computers unless you take out a second mortgage to use them. Had loads of adventures out there but haven't time to tell you today.

It's all looking good though especially with the new Jongleurs and Intertain taking over the old, it seems the comedy business is going from strength to strength and I'm not going to miss out after all the years of giving a pound of flesh for the big boys. Speak tomorrow, I've got football to watch on the box!! 

TUESDAY 3rd NOVEMBER

Last night in Redcar was not too bad. Only about 30 odd souls there. Redcar on a cold Monday in October is sobering stuff so to be honest the fact that there was anyone there at all makes you want to raise your glass. The music bits fucked up, the CDs haven't been burned properly I reckon. That's the last time I hire anyone cheaply. I made a joke about it all and thankfully they were a sort of crowd that took fuck ups in the spirit of how they should be taken.

Just one more tour show at the end of the month in Berwick and then three in December. All in all it's been not a bad little tour, I must do it all again sometime.

Off to Dubai tonight. I have to drive six hours to London Heathrow first. Can't wait to get back and have a weekend of enforced rest on the 13th and 14th. By that time I'll be 40 and surely I'll deserve some rest. The Jongleurs news is pleasing. I'd say the circuit's going to go through a sea change yet again in the next few years, for the better like. Speak tomorrow

MONDAY 2nd NOVEMBER

Yesterday was a hectic but fun day driving from Bristol to West London and appearing on Talk Of The Terrace on ESPN Sports. A great time was had, I would love to tell you about people being off with me and which particular members of the production team had ridiculous egos or attitude problems (if you read my blogs you know I will do that!) but as it happens everybody was really nice.

To be on a show with Ray Parlour, Phil Cornwell (who was a character on my favourite ever television programme) and King Kenny's daughter is bizarre enough but add in the fact that the producer, researcher and Chappers (the other presenter who I previously was apathetic about due to the fact I'd never met him) were genuinely nice folks who all wanted the show to work tells you how good fun the experience was. Good luck with the rest of the series everyone, hope it all works out.

The drive home was long and hard and made worse due to the fact that I've got a tour gig tonight in Redcar which I'm sure will be hard fuckin work. Never mind though, I go into my Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Doha and Barhain gigs feeling a bit better about comedy and the world. Speak very briefly tomorrow  

SUNDAY 1st NOVEMBER

Last night in Bristol was bloody hard work. As you can imagine everybody in the audience was dressed like they were in the Cure or in a sado masochists brothel and of course all insundry were pissed as well. There was a penguin suited wanker who tried to give me shit but he was put down by not only myself but all the other acts as well.

On my way to London now to do the ESPN programme at 6:30. Hopefully it won't be too bad and then it's off up the road to at least get some sleep before running round like a daft twat on Monday getting things sorted before my Dubai trip. There may be developments this week about shows and stuff but I'll let you know in due course. Speak tomorrow